Merry Christmas!!

I hope everyone's Christmas was as happy as ours. We had a bit of excitement last night when we got woken up with someone pounding and yelling at our door at 2:00AM... It ended up being an ambulance with the wrong street name (there's a court 1 street over from our road with the same name, and people get them mixed up quite often, but never quite so dramatically before), but luckily Jefferson slept through it and Duncan wasn't too hard to get back to sleep, and besides that and me burning the dinner rolls, I think our Christmas was quite wonderful. I'm so grateful for the opportunity Christmas gives for extra time with our families and to reflect on the birth and life of our Saviour.

"So now we are best friends"

One of the funnest parts of watching Duncan grow up and get older and change from a baby to a little boy is how he and Jefferson are starting to interact and play more and more.

A couple weeks ago the boys woke up especially early, and I could hear them in their room whispering and giggling, then they both crawled into our room with their blankets and pillows and climbed into our bed. Jefferson told me "I fell out of bed last night, and I was lonely, so I got in Duncan's bed, and I slept there. So now we are best friends".

Ever since then we've had a hard time getting them each to sleep in their own beds, I wouldn't mind if they shared a bed except for the fact that when they do they wake each other up during the night, and always wake up way too early in the morning.

At bed time Jefferson is usually very tired, and ready to fall to sleep, and Duncan still has energy (thanks to Jefferson's long days at school and Duncan's naps during the day), so Duncan wanting to play at bedtime is usually not very welcomed by Jefferson. Last night Jefferson kept telling Duncan to go back to his own bed, until he finally fell asleep, and then Duncan moved ALL his books (Duncan feels the need to sleep with about 30 books each night) and his pillow over to Jefferson's bed and read books to the sleeping Jefferson until he fell asleep too. When we went in to move him he grabbed Jefferson's arm in his sleep, and wouldn't let go, and got this little pout on his face like he knew what we were trying to do. 

(the cut on Duncan's eye is from a game Jefferson was playing with him where Duncan chased Jefferson with his eyes shut...)

I love little boys.

Feel very, very sick mama

A couple months ago Duncan started acting just generally sick and miserable, but his weirdest symptom was he wouldn't walk or really even move, and whenever we picked him up to move him he cried out like it hurt. Two trips to the pediatrician, a visit to the ER and a transfer to Childrens Hospital later, we finally discovered he had gotten a bacterial infection in the lymph nodes in one of his hips. After two days of IV antibiotics every 8 hours he was back to his old self, and they sent us home with a prescription for oral antibiotics to continue for 10 days.

The only problem was the antibiotics they wanted him on tasted HORRIBLE, and he couldn't swallow the pills, so we had to break open the pills and mix it with something and try and force feed it to him. We tried applesauce, jello, orange juice, and cranberry juice, but every dose involved LOTS of tears, and having to scoop the medicine back into his mouth as he spit it out and trying to force him to swallow it.

I talked to his pediatrician, and she said the taste of that particular medicine seems to be masked best by chocolate, so I went to the store and bought a bottle of chocolate syrup and a bag of chocolate chips, and the result was magic. We would give him 2 chocolate chips, then a spoonful of chocolate syrup with the medicine mixed in, and then 2 more chocolate chips after. He still grimaced a bit at the medicine, but the excitement of eating the chocolate made up for it, and he would ask for his medicine instead of screaming "NO!" when we brought it out.

Since then he has gone to the fridge and brought me the bottle of chocolate syrup several times, and told me it was time to take medicine. I have always just told him his medicine was all gone, and put it away, but today for some reason I just gave him a little syrup on a spoon and let him eat it. After he was done he sat there with his spoon for a while, then he went back to the fridge, got out the bottle, and carried it over to me and said "Duncan feel very, very sick mama. Need two more medicine".

I had to laugh.

Ch ch ch changes

One thing about living in this area is the constant flux of people in our lives. So many people move to this area for 1-4 years for school, job assignments, etc. We have made so many really awesome friends this way, but it's always really hard when it's time to say goodbye to those friends. This week we're loosing one of the little boys that has been doing preschool with us, and his mom and I have been good friends, and I'm really going to miss her, and her sweet little boy at preschool. 

This is kind of a shift of topic, but their move was pretty sudden, and it's had me thinking about the big changes and moves that have occurred in my life, and how often they are unexpected and sudden.

I remember when I was a young teenager we lived in a tiny town in Northern Utah, and it was one of those places where people lived for generations. I was definitely in the minority not having been born there, and having grandparents and great grandparents there. And I remember being literally terrified that I would never find a way to pay for college, and I would have to get a job there, and then I'd end up getting married to someone who worked at a factory there, and we'd live there forever. I remember praying fervently "PLEASE let me not have to live here forever, and please let me be able to travel when I grow up."

Now looking back I laugh a little at just how terrified I was, and it probably doesn't sound all that horrific. But to me at the time it seemed like the worst thing that could ever happen, and having never been on an airplane, and having only even visited 3 states in my life, the possibility of never going anywhere and being stuck there seemed very real to me. 

As I look back on my life from that point, I see that Heavenly Father did care about the prayers of that little girl, and he really has blessed me with lots of opportunities to travel and live in lots of different places. I have often gotten frustrated at my inability to plan my life, because of all the big changes that happen that completely "mess up" my plans. But looking back, I realize that I never could have planned a life as good as the one I have, and that each of those big changes have in the end been good, and led to something great. I guess this is kind of a sappy post, but I'm just feeling grateful today for an Almighty hand that guides my life, and the knowledge that he is there through the changes, and through the times when there aren't changes, when I think there should be, and I feel so grateful for the paths my life has taken, and all the dear good friends I've made along the way.

Dear Jefferson

Dear Jefferson,

When I look at you I see:

Your kind heart - You are so sensitive to the world around you, and you want so much to help everyone be happy. I love the cards and pictures you make me, and how you are so quick to tell me you love me.

Your creative spirit - You LOVE creating! Your constant art projects, the "chapters" of your stories you tell me, and the imaginative way you view the world keep me smiling and amazed.

Your determination, your love of all people and animals, your sense of humor, and so much more.

I wish I could help you see how amazing you are, just the way you are. That Heavenly Father created an incredible little person, and you don't have to change to get people to like you. That there will always be people who will be different than you, and some will disapprove of you, but you were made the way you are for a reason, and if you stay true to Heavenly Father and yourself, the world will be a better place because you are here.

I am so grateful you are my little boy!

Love,
Mom

Baby it's cold inside....

Our furnace is being very temperamental, so we have heat about 50% of the time right now. It's kind of like an adventure, never knowing if our house will be warm or cold when I wake up, or get home from the store, or after lunch, etc. But not a very fun adventure. I would be okay with it ending now.

The furnace repair man came this morning, and thought he fixed it, but then it stopped working again 2 hours later, so I guess it is not completely fixed. 

I would type more, but I'm going to go put gloves on now, and I'm not very good at typing with gloves on. 

Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing

Grant has become a fan of Spotify of late, and so we've been listening to some new albums, which has been fun.

A recent favorite is Sufjan Stevens "Songs for Christmas". I think our favorite song on the album is "Come On! Let's Boogey to the Elf Dance!", but there are lots of fun ones on there, and I really like his version of "I Saw Three Ships".

It also has a version of "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing", that song always makes me think of my dad, because I think it was his favorite song. Christmas time in general makes me think of him, since the last time I saw him was at a little Christmas party he put together for all us kids at Grandma's house the week between Christmas and New Years.

I didn't want to go, and I wasn't overly friendly, and to be honest I don't remember what we did, or ate, or how he looked, or really any details. The weird thing is when I try to remember the party the thing I picture most clearly is us all sitting my grandma's green shag carpet. But she replaced that carpet a long time ago, so it wasn't even there at the time, so I don't know why in there memories I try to re-create of the event all I can picture is that carpet. Things with my dad were complicated at the time, and while I understand why I acted the way I did, I wish I had tried a little harder to accept him reaching out. And I wish I'd given him a Christmas card and told him I love him.

Anyway, I've been thinking about the things that I think I inherited or learned from my dad, and that I'm grateful for -

- My love of reading. You hardly ever saw him sitting down without a book in his hand.
- My love of going places. Dad loved planning family vacations and going places, and he loved just going anywhere really. Sometimes on Sunday we would just get in the van and drive to nowhere in particular and just look at the scenery.
- My stubbornness. While this causes me a lot of grief at times, it's also been a blessing at others, because if I'm determined to make something happen, I generally stick at it until I find a way

So there you have it - kind of a random post, sorry!

Look UP!

I am constantly amazed at how when I ask something of my scripture study time I consistently get answers. I guess that part that really amazes me is how long it takes me to turn to the scriptures when I have experienced this phenomenon so many times.

As posted yesterday, I've been feeling rather overwhelmed, and to be honest, feeling a little sorry for myself. When my alarm went off this morning I seriously considered just going back to sleep, but Grant got right up, which inspired me to get up as well, so I did get my pre-awake-boys scripture study in, and it was so very renewing.

The past couple years I've been trying something new with my scripture study time, I'm working my way through the index of the Book of Mormon/Doctrine & Covenants and reading through the verses in each topic alphabetically. It has really been interesting, but very slow work, I am still in the C's. Today's topics were Cover & Covet.

Didn't sound to promising going in, but then right off the bat I read this scripture:
Abr. 2:16 - Therefore eternity was our covering, and our rock, and our salvation.

And it just reminded me that He that is eternal, and never changing, and always there, is MY covering, and MY rock, and MY salvation. That HE has a plan for my life, and can even help me with a plan for my day. That I'm dealing with the eternities here, not just Christmas parties and presents, and if those things are causing me to feel overwhelmed and unhappy, my focus is not in the right places.

And then all the covet scriptures reminded how TRULY blessed I am, and how I've been focusing on what I think I "deserve", instead of the great abundance that I do have.

So I still have a lot I need to do today, and have not yet cleaned the bathroom, (but I'm going to do that right now!), but I am feeling much more peaceful and happy today, and am so grateful for the balancing influence of the scriptures in my life.

Dwayne the Bathtub, I'm Dwowning!

Did your friends tell you that joke in Elementary school?

I'm having one of those weeks months where I feel like I can't quite stay afloat in my little teacup of responsibilities. I have so many projects and priorities pulling me at all times that I just really want life to stop for a few days so I can catch up. Anyone know how to arrange that?

I've been staying up too late trying to get stuff done, and then not waking up until the boys wake up, which always makes for a rougher start to the day, and seriously cuts down on my scripture study time, so I know that's one place I need to make a change. So that's my goal for tomorrow - start the day with reading my scriptures, and end the day at a decent time. And clean the bathroom. That's my other goal.

Here's to staying afloat through the Holidays