Yesterday I was working on getting mom's book ready for e-publishing, and I read this quote:
Only when you lift a burden, God will lift your burden. Divine paradox this! The man who staggers and falls because his burden is too great can lighten that burden by taking on the weight of another's burden. You get by giving, but your part of giving must be given first.
~Spencer W. Kimball
I need to make a specific effort to be focusing on service in my life. I always think about wanting to do more service, but rarely make a concerted effort to actually DO something.
Sorry this is short today, I've been working on mom's book and now I need to get off the computer
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Here we go again...
And again. And again.
Today I've been thinking about all the things that I do over and over and over again. It seems like life is chock full of stuff I do (or should do) in endless repetition.
First thing I thought of was food. I feed my boys 5+ times a day, and the amount of my day that goes into preparing, feeding, and cleaning up after the feeding is... Substantial. And it's not like I'm making gourmet meals here. And speaking of cleaning up after meals, just cleaning in general feels endless.
I'm not trying to sound depressing or begrudging, I was just thinking about it, and kind of wondering why. Why is our life set up in a way that we just do the same things over and over again? Why can't we just do something one or two times, and have learned it? And crocodiles only need to eat like once a week or less, that sounds nice sometimes.
Anyways, I guess I need to learn something from repetition. And I'm trying to figure out what. The only thought I've had so far is the sheer number of things always needing to be done keeps me from getting too complacent. Even if I spent all morning yesterday cleaning my bathroom and getting it spotless, 1 or 2 trips-to-the-bathroom-by-a-4-year-old-boy later it's destined to need to be cleaned again. I'm still thinking about it. Maybe I'll come up with something brilliant later today. After I clean the kitchen one more time.
Today I've been thinking about all the things that I do over and over and over again. It seems like life is chock full of stuff I do (or should do) in endless repetition.
First thing I thought of was food. I feed my boys 5+ times a day, and the amount of my day that goes into preparing, feeding, and cleaning up after the feeding is... Substantial. And it's not like I'm making gourmet meals here. And speaking of cleaning up after meals, just cleaning in general feels endless.
I'm not trying to sound depressing or begrudging, I was just thinking about it, and kind of wondering why. Why is our life set up in a way that we just do the same things over and over again? Why can't we just do something one or two times, and have learned it? And crocodiles only need to eat like once a week or less, that sounds nice sometimes.
Anyways, I guess I need to learn something from repetition. And I'm trying to figure out what. The only thought I've had so far is the sheer number of things always needing to be done keeps me from getting too complacent. Even if I spent all morning yesterday cleaning my bathroom and getting it spotless, 1 or 2 trips-to-the-bathroom-by-a-4-year-old-boy later it's destined to need to be cleaned again. I'm still thinking about it. Maybe I'll come up with something brilliant later today. After I clean the kitchen one more time.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Weekday Vegetarian
Our internet is down, it has been for 2 days. This happens on a fairly regular basis, so we decided to try a different internet provider. But for now we have no internet, so I'm writing this offline, then I'll move it online when I can connect to the internet again.
Dee just woke up so this is going to be very brief. For the last month we have been trying "weekday veg", which Grant saw a video about on TED
http://www.ted.com/talks/graham_hill_weekday_vegetarian.html
So far, so good, although I do have a hard time coming up with recipes that feel filling enough for Grant that I can also send as leftovers the next day. I decided I should keep track on here of what I am making and what we like/don't like. I've lost the first 2 weeks of meals, but here's what I've cooked for the last 3 weeks, and short notes on it:
Week 1
Mon - Baked Potatoes & Oven Roasted Broccoli - Grant didn't really touch the broccoli, and didn't seem overly enthused about baked potatoes as a main course in general
Tue - Tofu Tamale Pie - This is a vegetarian version of a meal Grant really likes. He said don't remind him of the meat version and he'll probably like it even more. I really liked it, and the leftovers the next day were yummy
Wed - Tomato Avocado Sandwiches & Oven Fries - Easy and generally liked. Maybe I'd get a bagel for Grant's sandwich so it's more filling.
Thu - Falafel on corn tortillas with hummus - Always goes over well here
Fri - Went to a friends for dinner
Week 2
Mon - Homemade Pizza - Not too much to say, everyone likes pizza, right?
Tue - Can't remember what we had this day, it's not written down…
Wed - Vegetarian Cincinnati Chili - Everyone liked this, but Grant says don't call it Cincinnati Chili and he'll like it more (see a theme here?)
Thu - Black Bean Quesadillas & Watermelon - Good
Fri - Oven Fried Fish & Baked Potatoes - I tried Swai Fillets, and I don't know if it was how I prepared them, but they were very fish-y tasting, and no one wanted seconds
Week 3 - (updated with notes on the meals)
Mon - Lentil Tacos - always a good basic veg meal
Tue - Peppery Fusilli & Rolls - Grant said "this is a good spaghetti variation". I was like "Spaghetti?!?! this is nothing like Spaghetti". He just shrugged. So yeah, pasta = spaghetti here.
Wed - Spinach Quiche, sweet potato oven fries - this was good, but I did the quiche crustless, and Grant said he would like it better with a crust
Thu - Black & White Checkered Chili, Corn chips & cheese - very yummy. Grant liked it a lot.
Fri - Papusas w/refried beans, corn, lettuce & tomatoes - Never ended up making this, I think we made pizza instead.
Dee just woke up so this is going to be very brief. For the last month we have been trying "weekday veg", which Grant saw a video about on TED
http://www.ted.com/talks/graham_hill_weekday_vegetarian.html
So far, so good, although I do have a hard time coming up with recipes that feel filling enough for Grant that I can also send as leftovers the next day. I decided I should keep track on here of what I am making and what we like/don't like. I've lost the first 2 weeks of meals, but here's what I've cooked for the last 3 weeks, and short notes on it:
Week 1
Mon - Baked Potatoes & Oven Roasted Broccoli - Grant didn't really touch the broccoli, and didn't seem overly enthused about baked potatoes as a main course in general
Tue - Tofu Tamale Pie - This is a vegetarian version of a meal Grant really likes. He said don't remind him of the meat version and he'll probably like it even more. I really liked it, and the leftovers the next day were yummy
Wed - Tomato Avocado Sandwiches & Oven Fries - Easy and generally liked. Maybe I'd get a bagel for Grant's sandwich so it's more filling.
Thu - Falafel on corn tortillas with hummus - Always goes over well here
Fri - Went to a friends for dinner
Week 2
Mon - Homemade Pizza - Not too much to say, everyone likes pizza, right?
Tue - Can't remember what we had this day, it's not written down…
Wed - Vegetarian Cincinnati Chili - Everyone liked this, but Grant says don't call it Cincinnati Chili and he'll like it more (see a theme here?)
Thu - Black Bean Quesadillas & Watermelon - Good
Fri - Oven Fried Fish & Baked Potatoes - I tried Swai Fillets, and I don't know if it was how I prepared them, but they were very fish-y tasting, and no one wanted seconds
Week 3 - (updated with notes on the meals)
Mon - Lentil Tacos - always a good basic veg meal
Tue - Peppery Fusilli & Rolls - Grant said "this is a good spaghetti variation". I was like "Spaghetti?!?! this is nothing like Spaghetti". He just shrugged. So yeah, pasta = spaghetti here.
Wed - Spinach Quiche, sweet potato oven fries - this was good, but I did the quiche crustless, and Grant said he would like it better with a crust
Thu - Black & White Checkered Chili, Corn chips & cheese - very yummy. Grant liked it a lot.
Fri - Papusas w/refried beans, corn, lettuce & tomatoes - Never ended up making this, I think we made pizza instead.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Climbing Back on the Bandwagon
I haven't done so well at writing for the past couple weeks... I'll skip the excuses, and just say yay for fresh starts.
I've been thinking a bit about being good enough for... everything I guess. I feel like it's a constant pull, to be good enough for this or that. And how defensive I feel when I start to feel not good enough. I think a lot of my anger and sadness in life comes down to fear of not being good enough. I get angry at Jay when I feel like I don't know what I'm doing, and I don't know how to control the situation at hand. I get angry at Grant when I feel like I've failed or I feel like he's critical of me or my efforts in some area.
So I'm trying to figure out letting that go. How can I get to where I can say "I am a good enough person for the Lord to love. And His love is enough. If I am trying to be the kind of person he wants me to be, I can accept who I am. I am not perfect, but I can be loving and loved in my current state".
I do want to be more loving, and less... Needy. I feel like I want constant affirmations that I'm good enough, and I don't want to be like that.
On a somewhat related note, I started this little bit of prose the other day, but I don't know where I want it to go. It's a continuation of something I wrote a really long time ago. Anyways, here's what I've got so far.
I've been thinking a bit about being good enough for... everything I guess. I feel like it's a constant pull, to be good enough for this or that. And how defensive I feel when I start to feel not good enough. I think a lot of my anger and sadness in life comes down to fear of not being good enough. I get angry at Jay when I feel like I don't know what I'm doing, and I don't know how to control the situation at hand. I get angry at Grant when I feel like I've failed or I feel like he's critical of me or my efforts in some area.
So I'm trying to figure out letting that go. How can I get to where I can say "I am a good enough person for the Lord to love. And His love is enough. If I am trying to be the kind of person he wants me to be, I can accept who I am. I am not perfect, but I can be loving and loved in my current state".
I do want to be more loving, and less... Needy. I feel like I want constant affirmations that I'm good enough, and I don't want to be like that.
On a somewhat related note, I started this little bit of prose the other day, but I don't know where I want it to go. It's a continuation of something I wrote a really long time ago. Anyways, here's what I've got so far.
ThemIt wasn’t them. The realization was all at once relieving and frightening. It wasn’t those brass eagles, with their fierce beaks and sharp claws. The holes in our rafts were from us. We floated along keeping our eyes on the eagles, covertly slashing holes in our own rafts, then screaming in anger at the eagles as we sank.
I guess we blamed the eagles because we didn’t understand the holes. Against all reason, they surprised us. Our ability to hurt something we needed, something that kept us afloat, without even flinching... just seemed wrong. And the eagles were there, just asking to be blamed.
That's all I have. I keep starting a 3rd paragraph and not liking it. I don't know what I want to say from there. Anyways, I think that is all for today.
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