Edges

"In permaculture there’s a principle called the “edge effect”. This is where two different ecosystems come up against each other and overlap. For many reasons, this region of overlap contains a great amount of biodiversity and productivity.

I love the edge effect in permaculture and I love the edge effect in life. I think about it every time we have a quarter moon and the light is meeting up against the dark. It’s the darkness of prior phases meeting up with the potential of what’s to come. Often during the quarter moons we experience that edge ourselves. Is there anything you are pushing towards or trying to step into? The space where we meet up against something new is the space where we have the opportunity to experience the most growth and productivity.

And dear luna...she reminds us to just keep pushing. Keep pushing towards light and manifestation - even if it’s hard right now. You are getting your most growth being on the edge and I whole-heartedly believe that you’ve got this."
- Heather from StoryLunaStory on Instagram


Heather's post on her StoryLunaStory account never fail to inspire me, and her post yesterday was no exception.  And it got me thinking about the edges in my life. About why so often I want to pull back from the edge, move away from areas of discomfort and stick to what feels known and safe. How often as I stand at the edge of the old and the new, looking forward into the unknown and then down or back into where I am or where I've been, I step back or stand still, for fear that when I start moving forward I won't know what I'm doing and will make a fool of myself. Because that edge area is grey and unsure, I'm still forming my opinions and figuring out my intentions. 

But there are several areas of my life where I've been feeling very stuck recently, and I'm realizing the course forward out of that stuck-ness might not always be direct and steady, that it's more likely a two-steps-forward-and-one-step-back type of journey. And if I don't make those two steps forward because I'm too afraid of needing to take a step back, I'll just stay stuck. 

So many parenting books I've been reading recently talk about the need for children to feel safe to make mistakes, to not feel like every misstep is a tragedy, but that the path to growth is lined with failed attempts. While it's been easy for me to see how that's true for my kids, I've been less willing to accept failure as part of growth in my own life. To stop letting those failed attempts feel so heavy and important and instead just let go of them and view them as an important part of my journey instead of proof that I'm not enough for the journey. 

Today, when I feel an edge between growth and stagnation, I'm going to try and resist that urge to pull back, and choose growth.