Karl's Birth Story

I have to start of by saying this pregnancy had been so different from the start than my other 2. I had almost no morning sickness this pregnancy, to the point I really didn't think the pregnancy was viable. I had WAY more heartburn, and my ribs hurt even more then my other 2 pregnancies. I didn't have the constant BH contractions that I'd had with the other boys, and I felt like I gained weight and carried the weight I gained differently. In short, just a very different pregnancy. All of this probably should have prepared me for a very different labor/delivery as well...

Tuesday Jan 31 - Mom flew in! I was SO excited to have her here, and really hoping Karl would come soon so I could have as much time as possible with Mom AND Karl here at the same time. 

Wednesday Feb 1 - Had an appointment with the midwives, the midwife that day was Dustie, not my favorite one, she checked me and told me I was barely a 2, and baby was still at -2, so kind of high... She said she would try stripping my membranes to see if that would get anything started. We took Duncan to preschool and ran some errands, but I felt pretty discouraged that whole day, and went to bed early crying. 

Thursday Feb 2 - My due date. Jeff had been 10 days early, Duncan 5, so I'd never made it to my due date before. Grant's Aunt's birthday (his dad's only sister) is Feb 2, so Grant's dad was really hoping I'd have the baby Feb 2, so I woke up feeling a little sad because it didn't look like that was going to happen. For scripture reading that morning I picked up my Nov '11 Ensign and flipped through the talks just reading things I'd highlighted in the past. 

When I got to Elder Uchtdorf's talk "You Matter To Him" I read the story of when he was in army training in Texas feeling very alone and discouraged. Then he said "What mattered to Him was that I was doing the best I could, that my heart was inclined toward Him, and I was willing to help those around me. I knew if I did the best I could, all would be well. 

And all was well"

When I read that I felt peace that all was going to be well, and I just needed to do the best I could to stay positive. That day we ran more errands and did a few projects around the house, and early in the day I started to notice I was having pretty consistent contractions, more "real" feeling than my BH contractions had been before then. But they were staying pretty consistent around 5-10 min apart, and weren't increasing in intensity or closeness, so I did my best to ignore them. 

By late in the afternoon they were still the same, but because they hadn't changed or gone away I told Grant about them, and he was hopeful they would progress and we would be going to the hospital later that day/evening. But by bed time they were still exactly the same as they had been all day... So I went to bed hoping I could sleep through them. For the most part I was successful, I woke up to them a few times, but each time was able to go back to sleep pretty easily. 

Friday Feb 3

3:45 AM - I woke up to my water breaking, which was a shock, since my water had never really broken with Jefferson and Duncan until just before they were born. I woke up Grant kind of frantically, and we decided to head to the hospital so they could start the IV for the antibiotics since I was Group B strep positive this pregnancy. After we started driving there was some confusion as I'd forgotten to get the number I was supposed to call, but we finally got it all worked out and woke up the midwife on call and told her we were on our way to the hospital, and she said she'd meet us there but would get there after us. 

4:30 AM - We get to the hospital and fill out admission paperwork and wait in the waiting room. All this time I'm having contractions every 5 minutes that I can't talk through, but I'm still able to handle them pretty well. 

5:15 AM - They finally come and take us back to a room, where the midwife meets us. It was Tara who was on call, which I was happy about, I like her. They have me change into a hospital gown and hook up the contraction monitors, and then the midwife checks me - almost 4 cm, he's still high, at -2 station. 

I immediately feel very discouraged. Both my boys I was already 6-7 cm by the time I got to the hospital, and it was still hours before they were born. I'd been 4 cm and +2 with Duncan 24 hours before I even went into labor. So I'm feeling stupid for coming to the hospital so early, and waking the midwife up when I'll probably still be in labor for a day, but then the midwife says something doesn't feel right and she wants to do an ultrasound. 

They pull in the ultrasound machine, and it takes 10 min or so to turn on, and then she looks at the baby - he's breech. I couldn't believe it. They hadn't done any ultrasounds since my 20 week one, but the midwives had always thought he'd been head down feeling his position from the outside, and both Jefferson and Duncan had been head down from like 32 weeks on (I had later ultrasounds with both of them), and I'd just assumed this baby had been too. The midwife said the OB they work with was already at the hospital, he was with a patient that they were waiting for her to be ready to deliver, and she would go check with him, but at this point I was going to be having a c-section. 

I was... I don't know. Stunned? I guess I knew in the back of my head that things can always go wrong during labor, and a c-section was a possibility, but I never really thought I would actually have one. I started crying, mostly just trying to process it all I think. Tara was great, and sat with me, and talked me through how it would all go. She asked if I wanted to get an epidural then so I didn't have to deal with the contractions anymore, or if I felt I could wait and get a spinal at the surgery. They said a spinal is preferred, and I was handling the contractions pretty well, so I said I would wait. She said if they could get me in surgery by 6/6:15 they would do the c-section then, if not I'd have to wait until after shift change at 7:00, and it would be at like 7:30. I hoped and prayed that they would be able to get me in soon, because I wanted it to be over with and have my baby as soon as possible. 

But I should say at this point that even though I was kind of emotional and crying, when she told me that I was going to be having a c-section, once again the quote came to mind "And all was well", and I knew that a c-section was the right answer for us, and everything was going to be okay. 

6:15 AM - The OB's other patient was progressing slower than they originally thought, so the OB decided he could do my surgery before she was ready to deliver, so everything started to happen really quickly. The anesthesiologist came in and explained the spinal to me and had me sign the consent papers for that. Then they came and wheeled me into the OR, and I climbed up on the table and he put in the spinal. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be, I think I had prepared my mind for horrible pain, and it really wasn't awful. Then I laid down and they put up the drape and began prepping for the surgery. I was amazed at how quickly I felt numb it seemed almost immediate from when he put the spinal in. They brought Grant in, and within a couple minutes we heard a cry, and Karl was here! 

We didn't have our camera in the OR, so this fuzzy one from Grant's cell phone is the only picture we have

They took him over to the warming table, and Grant went over and watched them weigh him (8 pounds even, 21 inches long) and get him wrapped up in a blanket, then they brought him over to me. I don't think I cried when my other boys were born, but for some reason I started crying, and Tara helped me hold him and I just kissed his head and cried, I was so happy he was here and healthy. I started to feel sick from the stuff in my IV I guess, so Grant took him back until I was done with surgery.

7:00 AM - They wheeled us into recovery, and a lady came who helped me get Karl latched on and nursing, and he nursed for a good 20 minutes, then fell asleep, then the head nursery lady came in and did all the infant care stuff right there by my bed. Then they wheeled us up to our "mother and baby suite" where we stayed for the rest the time at the hospital. I couldn't believe it was over, and I already had a baby in my arms, it all felt like it went so quickly. The c-section wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be either. The "pressure and tugging" they told me I'd feel was very weird, but not horrible, and it was all over pretty quickly.

The first 2 days of recovery were not fun, I felt so... damaged? I just felt like I'd never be able to move without hurting again, I'm something of a drama queen sometimes, ha ha. But I started to feel better pretty quickly, they let me go home Sunday, and by Monday I was just taking regular ibuprofen and feeling pretty okay as long as I took it easy. 

 Meeting his brothers, this was probably the height of my misery, I was so itchy from the medicine in the spinal, so my face was all blotchy from scratching it, and I was so puffy and swollen from all the IV fluids, so ignore the sick looking lady in the background

Overall I feel really blessed in how everything turned out, and I can truly look back on the experience and say "And all was well". Even though I was very anxious about him coming so "late", with having a c-section I'm so glad he came after my mom was here, because I really needed the extra help. And even though a c-section wasn't what I was hoping or planning for, I feel like it was the right answer for getting Karl here safely, and it went very smoothly and I'm recovering really well. Alright, this has taken me forever to get written, so I'm just going to finish with this picture of the little man himself:

baby Karl, 3 days old

Christmas Video

Grant finished editing our 2011 Christmas video last night, and I think he did an amazing job, I keep watching it again and again, although I may be *slightly* biased. Here it is for your viewing pleasure:

Courage

I picked up our January Ensign the other day, and I was reading some of the articles, and I ended up writing so many quotes down in my notebook, it was so full of advice that felt so needed to me right now. I really liked the first presidency message by President Monson "The Abundant Life", and these 2 quotes on courage were my favorite.

"Whatever you decide to do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide on, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising to tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to the end requires some of the same courage a soldier needs. Peace has it's victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them" - R. W. Emerson

" Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says "I'll try again tomorrow" "

Speaking of courage... Jefferson has been telling me recently that he gets teased at school for liking the color pink, and "baby" t.v. shows. I feel like he learns things so much better through stories, so I want to have stories to tell him about kids being teased and standing up for themselves and being kind in return. So if anyone knows of any such stories and would point me in their direction, or advice on dealing with teasing and little kids, it would be greatly appreciated.

Merry Christmas!!

I hope everyone's Christmas was as happy as ours. We had a bit of excitement last night when we got woken up with someone pounding and yelling at our door at 2:00AM... It ended up being an ambulance with the wrong street name (there's a court 1 street over from our road with the same name, and people get them mixed up quite often, but never quite so dramatically before), but luckily Jefferson slept through it and Duncan wasn't too hard to get back to sleep, and besides that and me burning the dinner rolls, I think our Christmas was quite wonderful. I'm so grateful for the opportunity Christmas gives for extra time with our families and to reflect on the birth and life of our Saviour.

"So now we are best friends"

One of the funnest parts of watching Duncan grow up and get older and change from a baby to a little boy is how he and Jefferson are starting to interact and play more and more.

A couple weeks ago the boys woke up especially early, and I could hear them in their room whispering and giggling, then they both crawled into our room with their blankets and pillows and climbed into our bed. Jefferson told me "I fell out of bed last night, and I was lonely, so I got in Duncan's bed, and I slept there. So now we are best friends".

Ever since then we've had a hard time getting them each to sleep in their own beds, I wouldn't mind if they shared a bed except for the fact that when they do they wake each other up during the night, and always wake up way too early in the morning.

At bed time Jefferson is usually very tired, and ready to fall to sleep, and Duncan still has energy (thanks to Jefferson's long days at school and Duncan's naps during the day), so Duncan wanting to play at bedtime is usually not very welcomed by Jefferson. Last night Jefferson kept telling Duncan to go back to his own bed, until he finally fell asleep, and then Duncan moved ALL his books (Duncan feels the need to sleep with about 30 books each night) and his pillow over to Jefferson's bed and read books to the sleeping Jefferson until he fell asleep too. When we went in to move him he grabbed Jefferson's arm in his sleep, and wouldn't let go, and got this little pout on his face like he knew what we were trying to do. 

(the cut on Duncan's eye is from a game Jefferson was playing with him where Duncan chased Jefferson with his eyes shut...)

I love little boys.

Feel very, very sick mama

A couple months ago Duncan started acting just generally sick and miserable, but his weirdest symptom was he wouldn't walk or really even move, and whenever we picked him up to move him he cried out like it hurt. Two trips to the pediatrician, a visit to the ER and a transfer to Childrens Hospital later, we finally discovered he had gotten a bacterial infection in the lymph nodes in one of his hips. After two days of IV antibiotics every 8 hours he was back to his old self, and they sent us home with a prescription for oral antibiotics to continue for 10 days.

The only problem was the antibiotics they wanted him on tasted HORRIBLE, and he couldn't swallow the pills, so we had to break open the pills and mix it with something and try and force feed it to him. We tried applesauce, jello, orange juice, and cranberry juice, but every dose involved LOTS of tears, and having to scoop the medicine back into his mouth as he spit it out and trying to force him to swallow it.

I talked to his pediatrician, and she said the taste of that particular medicine seems to be masked best by chocolate, so I went to the store and bought a bottle of chocolate syrup and a bag of chocolate chips, and the result was magic. We would give him 2 chocolate chips, then a spoonful of chocolate syrup with the medicine mixed in, and then 2 more chocolate chips after. He still grimaced a bit at the medicine, but the excitement of eating the chocolate made up for it, and he would ask for his medicine instead of screaming "NO!" when we brought it out.

Since then he has gone to the fridge and brought me the bottle of chocolate syrup several times, and told me it was time to take medicine. I have always just told him his medicine was all gone, and put it away, but today for some reason I just gave him a little syrup on a spoon and let him eat it. After he was done he sat there with his spoon for a while, then he went back to the fridge, got out the bottle, and carried it over to me and said "Duncan feel very, very sick mama. Need two more medicine".

I had to laugh.

Ch ch ch changes

One thing about living in this area is the constant flux of people in our lives. So many people move to this area for 1-4 years for school, job assignments, etc. We have made so many really awesome friends this way, but it's always really hard when it's time to say goodbye to those friends. This week we're loosing one of the little boys that has been doing preschool with us, and his mom and I have been good friends, and I'm really going to miss her, and her sweet little boy at preschool. 

This is kind of a shift of topic, but their move was pretty sudden, and it's had me thinking about the big changes and moves that have occurred in my life, and how often they are unexpected and sudden.

I remember when I was a young teenager we lived in a tiny town in Northern Utah, and it was one of those places where people lived for generations. I was definitely in the minority not having been born there, and having grandparents and great grandparents there. And I remember being literally terrified that I would never find a way to pay for college, and I would have to get a job there, and then I'd end up getting married to someone who worked at a factory there, and we'd live there forever. I remember praying fervently "PLEASE let me not have to live here forever, and please let me be able to travel when I grow up."

Now looking back I laugh a little at just how terrified I was, and it probably doesn't sound all that horrific. But to me at the time it seemed like the worst thing that could ever happen, and having never been on an airplane, and having only even visited 3 states in my life, the possibility of never going anywhere and being stuck there seemed very real to me. 

As I look back on my life from that point, I see that Heavenly Father did care about the prayers of that little girl, and he really has blessed me with lots of opportunities to travel and live in lots of different places. I have often gotten frustrated at my inability to plan my life, because of all the big changes that happen that completely "mess up" my plans. But looking back, I realize that I never could have planned a life as good as the one I have, and that each of those big changes have in the end been good, and led to something great. I guess this is kind of a sappy post, but I'm just feeling grateful today for an Almighty hand that guides my life, and the knowledge that he is there through the changes, and through the times when there aren't changes, when I think there should be, and I feel so grateful for the paths my life has taken, and all the dear good friends I've made along the way.